In which I reflect on the almost seven months of working on my list, and compare to the first seven months of my last list.
I have been in a bit of a slump recently. I have been working on certain items from my list, but have been focusing more on my monthly missions than my main list goals. For some reason, this 101 project hasn’t grabbed me with the intensity that my first attempt did. On a surface level, I think that makes sense. My expectations for this project are much more reasonable, while my goals tend to have more complex motivations than the ones on my first list. Both factors that lend a different tone.
I attempted the last 101 project while I made some life changes that resulted in me being alone far more often than I was used to: moving to a new city, where I didn’t know anybody; working from home; not getting to see my husband as much as I’d like because we are trying to find a balance between work, writing, and marriage. I’m back in that situation for the start of this second project, but I’ve struggled to use my list to distract me from these concerns. That’s partly because I am handling this much better this second time around. I’m feeling less lonely as a whole, more comfortable with supporting the hubs in carving out time for him to write, and frankly, I’ve become more accustomed to spending my days alone. Yay, me?
I can still pinpoint ways that I’d like to improve myself and my life. But on a whole, things are going pretty well. I’m feeling like I am on track in my life. And that makes it easier to float a bit more, rather than spending time and energy to focus on the things that could be improved. For the past couple of years, the hubs and I have been daydreaming about getting things more settled and getting out of limbo. Here we are, more settled, and I’m still allowing myself to float along. I’m uncomfortable with that when I stop to think about it.
I’ve been thinking about my 101 project a lot recently. Trying to think of ways to make it sparkly and new. But I’ve decided that I really just need to get back to the root of what I’m trying to do here. I’m trying to bring more joy into my daily life while conducting myself gracefully in all sorts of situations. Even if individual goals aren’t grabbing me right now, those themes still resonate with me. So, I’ve decided to court some motivation by reconnecting.
Reconnecting to my list.
I’ve pulled out my notebook where I listed each goal and have begun to write up the reasons I included each on my list. I’ve gotten lots of ideas for blog posts on some that I’ve been working on without realizing it, and more ideas about where to start on specific goals. I can feel that beginning to click.
Reconnecting to my friends about our projects.
I am not the only one who has been having these feelings of inertia. I’m so lucky to be pursuing this project in the company of such good friends. They validate my feelings while still encouraging me to seek a way out of them. I think motivation breeds more motivation. When one of us is excited about a goal, that enthusiasm is contagious. We are planning to meet for a discussion of our 101 projects next month, and I am really looking forward to it.
Reconnecting with my first list.
I am also turning my attention back to my first list. I plan on completing a photo book documenting my progress on that list, but I haven’t touched it in months. I’m hoping that writing up the accomplishments that got me so excited the first time around will help my general mindset about my current list.